I finally found my dream job

So  I was browsing Craigslist today for various reasons, and came across the opportunity of a lifetime. Life works in mysterious ways, and sometimes your dream job pops up on your screen while sitting in stats class.

tickle craigslist

I literally don’t think that there’s a job that I’m more qualified for. I’m ticklish as shit. I’m basically a 6’5″ Elmo doll. Is there any better gig than getting tickled for money? Warren Buffet says you’re not truly rich until you make money while you sleep. Well I’m about to one up Warren. You’re not truly rich until you make money while you’re tickled. Talk about multiple streams of income. I’m sort of mad I didn’t find this earlier. I’ve been getting tickled for free for years. 22 years a tickle slave. I’m like the Harriet Tubman of being tickled. Rule number 1 of business is to never do something you’re good at for free. I’ve been an absolute sucker for years, because I am great at being tickled.

Part of me wants to sign up asap. The other part of me is 100% positive that this guy will rape me. Like one second I’m being tickled, the next second this guy is wearing my skin for a raincoat. So sort of a coin toss situation. This all comes down to risk vs. reward. To be successful you have to be comfortable being uncomfortable. Leave your comfort zone. This is a great example. The tickle market is an untapped market in my opinion. I see huge opportunity there. I would say I want to get in on the ground floor, but I have a feeling this is more of a basement situation.

So I went against my better judgement, and put business over emotions (my fear of being raped), and reached out to my future business partner:

tickle email

I’ve been trying to follow up the Weymouth John interview for a while, but have been having trouble finding a good candidate. It’s tough to follow up an interview where you get a grown man to admit he’s a gay prostitute live on camera, only to have that grown man’s mother email you threatening to sue you and call the police. Okay lady, I’m not the one who’s son blows guys for money.

Anyway, I think I found the one. Also, how about me writing the most professional email I’ve ever written to a guy looking to tickle me? Typical me, being able to switch up writing styles on a dime. 5 tool player.

So hopefully this works out. Then again, I think this might be a little too gay, even for me. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

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